Aug 18, 2008

A View of Time (your mileage may vary)

Actual Time Remaining until Wedding: 19 calendar days

Actual Conversation at 5:00 AM this morning:
Me: I woke up feeling really anxious this morning.
Morley: Why? We've got plenty of time--nearly three weeks.
Me: You gotta be kidding! We don't have three weeks! We've got a day or two, max!
Morley: (blank stare)
Me: Seriously!
Morley: (blank stare) (adopts soothing tone in voice) We have lots of time--weeks!--and besides, everything is pretty much done. And don't forget we close on the new boat today! Isn't that exciting?
Me: (blank stare)
Me: I forgot all about the boat! How could I forget we're buying a boat?
Morley: (soothing tone of voice now tinged with a touch of alarm) Maybe you just need more coffee--you just sit there and rest, honey. I'll go get it for you. Honey? Susan? Hello?
Me: (blank stare)
Me: (blank stare)

My view of the timeline:
Subtract 7 days spent on mission trip to a third world country (where I will get a farmer's tan which ought to look awesome with my wedding dress), which leaves 12 days. Subtract 1 day for remedial work following mission trip (removing dirt from under nails, treating insect bites and sunburn, removing black volcanic soil from scalp, pores, luggage, laundry, etc), which leaves 11 days. Subtract 2 days getting documentation, travel arrangements and supplies ready for mission trip (I'm the Mission Trip Coordinator), which leaves 9 days. Subtract the day before the wedding and the actual wedding day, which leaves 7 days. Subtract 5 days (out of the 15 work days between now and wedding) spent in half-ass effort at my actual real job, which leaves 2 days. Subtract 1 day spent on mandatory pre-wedding activities such as obtaining marriage license, final meetings with DJ, caterer, musicians, photographer, minister, putting clean sheets on guestroom beds, buying groceries so houseguests won't starve, making arrangements for dinner following the rehearsal, picking up flowers shipped in the day before the wedding, delivering reception decorations to caterer, calculating final headcount, arranging with neighbors to pick up guests arriving at airport the day before wedding, etc.

19 days minus 18 days=1 day until the wedding.

And I totally forgot about closing on the boat today (minus 1 day) which means the wedding IS RIGHT NOW, THIS RED HOT MINUTE!!

Morley's view of the timeline:
break in new workboots for mission trip: check!
wedding clothes pressed: check!
buy a new boat: check!
get marriage license

1 comment:

  1. I have to tellya Susan, it's probably a good thing that you're so dang busy; else this blog would be so full of posts that we wouldn't be able to keep up with 'em. Of course, this could just be a brief respite!